This New Thing
This New Thing
(#118 from Suffer Well Devotional Series©)
www.sufferwell.org
Growing in you,
You, growing in Me,
A Spirit rising,
Light pushing out darkness,
Inside of you.
Chemicals shift,
Thought processes change,
Mindsets shatter.
Intense, yet reserved…?
Intense, yet reserved? What is this thing still lingering, this reservation? It is the core issue, no? Is it the piece of flesh You left behind in me Father? Must it remain? Will it always be? My heart (mind) explodes with a longing to rejoice in a victory that has not yet been fully attained. Should I? Should I fully rejoice while there is work yet to be done? Is the reservation smart, wise, and Spirit led? There is a voice saying, “Is it real; is it really You Father?” Is this reservation doubt? Is it wisdom? It feels safe, yet it feels doubtful.
Root it out Father. I desire true freedom, a deeper freedom. I desire the unreserved freedom of a warrior kneeling before You, handing over his sword, or a maiden who realizes that You are the only true Husband. I desire to be submitted to You in everything, along with the wisdom to not boast in my own efforts. Fill me with a heart that only wants to boast of Your work in me. “He did this. Look. Look at my Daddy. He will never let you hurt me.”
Tears flow as I write this. As my pen hits paper, the boy in me realizes that I could never have uttered those words about my earthly father. How could I say such words about one who hurt, rather than protected my little heart? I forgive him, and I need him to forgive me. There is a great love today, yet I wonder if the tentacles of reservation still remain.
No Father, these reservations are not smart, wise, or Spirit lead. It is time to step over into a new place; into a new thing where, for the first time in my life, I get personal proof that I have a Father Who protects and does not hurt. I have a Daddy who will not discard me, even when I am not worthy of love. I can live a new life with no more rejection, only pure love from the Father of love, forever.
What is this reservation in me? Come Daddy. Come.
For He satisfies the longing soul, and fills the hungry soul with goodness. (Psalm 107:9)